The other side

Clearly we know where I stand on this, but what is going through the head of my other half? Since we have an appointment this week, I thought it would be go to get B in here as a guest blogger. Exciting? Yes. So without further delay, here is the man of the hour!!!!! *applause*

I am not as good of a writer as L is, but I will try my best. When she first told me she was worried about having kids, I was angry, I felt that she had lied to me. We had that conversation before and she seemed to be OK with it, but then she changed her mind. After a couple of days, we discussed it further, and we began to discuss other options. They weren't my first choice, and it wasn't something I wanted to think about. I knew that I wanted a biological kid, so we agreed to try surrogacy, but it still wasn't my first choice at that time.

I thought about it for a while, and then L brought up the issue again, and I began to realize that surrogacy was our best option. It wasn't easy to accept, but it kept my wife safe, and gave me a biological baby. Even though I was angry originally, I became more ok with the idea. As L has stated many times, I process things much differently than her. The day that our SM agreed to do this for us, I was very happy. I think my hesitation stemmed from the fact that surrogacy is different, complicated, and expensive. Looking back on it now, I realize that this is the best option because L won't die, and she will be around to raise our baby. We will be a family.

The past few months have been stressful. It is hard to keep up with the checklist, and appointments. Plus living with L is like having a calendar in your ear all the time. At the same time it's also been exciting, because each step puts us closer to a child. I am very nervous, because if we have a girl, there is no way I can handle that, she will be on house arrest until she is 30. I can barely hold a baby now, and we crate our dog, so how can I care for an infant? That doesn't mean that I won't love and care for this baby with all of my heart. I know that I will be the best dad ever, even if it takes some time getting use to. I know that L will be an amazing mom, even if she'll be the second favorite parent. She is awesome, caring, funny (but not as funny as she thinks), patient, pretty, and smart.

Thinking about the future, I am excited about this process. Even though I wasn't onboard originally, I couldn't imagine it any other way. I wanted to take a minute to say thank you to everyone who has supported us this far. Your support is encouraging, and gives us hope. I know that we are luckier than most and am overwhelmed by it all. In closing, I look forward to the next steps. Thank you again for all your kind words, they help more than you know.