A Mother's Wisdom

If you are a doubter, or a skeptic, turn away now!

When you go through a process like this, there are times of uncertainty, and times where you are filled with doubt. There is so much stress, and pressure, and I'm not even going to be pregnant! I can't even imagine what it's like to be on the other side of things. Thankfully, our surrogate is calm, cool, collected, and awesome! This blog post is very much a flashback, and very much overdue.

First off, I should state that I have an amazing relationship with my mother. She has been a rock for me through this process, and we are fortunate to have her live so close by.

My mom was raised a strict, proud, catholic. My grandfather was a deacon, and religion is one of the focal points of her life. Over the years, she has come to the belief that God speaks to us through others in times of stress or need. She often tells the story of having a dream about a roommate's friend (who she didn't know) in a time of crisis. The dream was regarding the birth of her roommate's friends baby. The statistics of the birth, all turned out to be an exact match. I'm not saying my mother is psychic, I'm saying that at that moment in time, it seems to her and me, that God spoke to her to ease her friends concerns. It was only later that it was verified. I promise this is important.

Throughout this whole process, everyone has said that when they pray, they get feelings of reassurance, that they know this will work etc... Everyone but me that is. I have gotten nothing, it's radio silence for me on the other end, and I am one of the people who need it the most. On Good Friday, I had an acupuncture appointment, and in the 30 minutes of silence, I prayed. I prayed hard, for a sign, a sliver of hope, etc something for just me. My appointment was at 11:00...the day after we found out we were putting in two embryos.

When I spoke to my mom later that day, she informed me that as she was walking at the Cross Walk (a Holy Week event in our town), a random thought popped into her head. It was of both her and I holding babies, wrapped in the hospital receiving blankets. When I asked my mom what time this happened, she replied, probably a little after 11:00.

Now, you can doubt this all you want, but I'm going with that this was my sign. Who better than to deliver it then my mother, who wanted and prayed for me all those years? Judge or think what you may, I'm holding on to my beacon of hope, and having faith in my mother's wisdom, that I too will be a Mom someday soon.